Over the past couple weeks, as social unrest has run rampant in our country, people have expressed their anger publicly through demonstrations and even riots. Triggered by the killing of an unarmed African-American man in Minneapolis by a police officer, the protests have grown and morphed into violence, fueled I believe by a combination of simmering angers, political agendas, and covid-19 consequences – such as long-term isolation and job losses. Unfortunately, much of the vitriol against injustice has been directed against people who had nothing to do with the triggering act, such as first-responders, shop owners, and complete strangers.
I received some of the hate this week myself.
It started about 3:15 one morning when my cell phone woke me with a call from a Louisiana number. When I answered, a little girl’s voice asked to speak to Stephanie. Since there is no Stephanie in our home or family, I told the girl that and said she must have the wrong number. She said okay sweetly and we said, “Bye, bye” to each other. No problem; simple error. A few seconds later the same number called, and figuring she had redialed the wrong number, I answered again. I did not expect what I heard this time: an older woman’s voice telling me, “I hope you die and go to hell!” I guess next time I should say, “This is Stephanie” in a high voice.
Over the next couple days I had several more calls and texts from Louisiana, Virginia, West Virginia, Arizona, and even British Columbia. While two were hang-ups, one voicemail was so foul and obscenity-laden I would never repeat what the young woman said. The fact that she was addressing her rant to someone named Katie only made her choice of wording that much worse. Maybe I should have said, “This is Katie” in a high voice to spare the real Katie from such abuse!
The fact other names were used makes me think the callers had the wrong number, but the number of calls and the wide range of caller locations makes me suspect a coordinated political effort.
As I heard each call or read each text message, I couldn’t help but think about how I should respond. Should I mimic voices like I joked above, just hang up, or yell and insult the caller back, telling them to “Get the —- off my phone!”?
While I did toy with playing games with such callers, such as I once did with a phone solicitor wanting to sell me solar panels – I told him no, since solar panels use up sunlight and there’s only so much sunlight to go around – I decided the best thing was to ignore the insults and just hang up.
There were practical reasons for doing so: 1. As my parents taught me, if you engage in a fight you’re only giving the bully what he or she wants: a reaction from their victim; 2. Some of the calls were aimed at others, not me; 3. “Sticks and stones, etc.”; 4. I doubt the callers were open to a calm and logical discussion seeking harmonious agreement; and 5. I don’t know enough nasty words or how to use them to hold my own in a cussing match!
But the real reason not to engage in a dispute, or to bear any grudge against the callers, is even deeper, and that is what our Lord taught us through Scripture.
1. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus taught us, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust” (Matthew 5:43-45).
2. Likewise, in Luke 6:27-28 Jesus said, “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”
3. Paul wrote in Romans 12:14, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them.”
4. Even more generally, the command of both testaments, old and new, is that God commands us to love our neighbor as ourselves. Therefore, if I truly love my neighbors, I will forgive them their angry outbursts, even as I would appreciate them forgiving my sins. Martin Luther picked up on this and expressed it in his Small Catechism when explaining the Eighth Commandment: “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor. What does this mean? We should fear and love God so that we do not tell lies about our neighbor, betray him, slander him, or hurt his reputation, but defend him, speak well of him, and explain everything in the kindest way.” Yelling back at a caller is not speaking well of that person, who, though misguided, is still my neighbor.
God’s command that we respond with love to those who harm us or curse us does not mean we sit back passively and approve of everything that anyone does. I have to admit that much of what I saw on TV was unsettling and even angering: how can I condone smashing windows, burning cars, and looting goods from stores with smiles on the looters’ faces? Or for that matter, kneeling on a person’s neck until he dies? I felt anger rising in me toward everyone involved because much of what I saw was just not right! But then, I realized I was in danger of my “righteous” anger becoming a sin and recalled Paul’s words in Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil,” and in verses 31-32, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Therefore, I refuse to be goaded into an attitude of hate. Instead, I prayed for the people who called, that their hatred be healed and released, and that they come to know the peace which passes understanding in Christ, through whom we can endure all things (1 Corinthians 13:7) and do all things: “through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).
May you and I keep that peace foremost in our hearts ad minds, and in our words and actions!
May the Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you, the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace. Amen.
Read: Matthew 5, Philippians 4, Ephesians 4:26-32
